seejelly:

two years ago i was licking a lollipop and some dude said “watching a girl eat a lollipop is a great way to see how well she gives blowjobs” so i bit the lollipop in half and spit it out 

(Source: standardgaydad)

human:

petition to have That’s So Raven added to Netflix 

theyreoutofcontrol:

Interviewer: “so where do you see yourself in five years?”
Me: “I’m shaking hands with Dumbledore I’ve won the house cup”

thebabbagepatch:

holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit

(Source: sizvideos)

tags: are you for real? + I want this + better start saving +

m0xt:

Imagine being the kid that got benched so your coach could put Airbud the fucking dog in the game

cosmictuesdays:

nadiacreek:

coelasquid:

deformutilated:

Fudge recipe on a headstone

I feel like I should make this just to be able to say a dead person taught me how to make it. Maybe I’ll do it for Halloween.

I desperately hope that she spent her entire life telling people that they could have her fudge recipe “over my dead body.”

That last comment is absolutely worth reblogging.

benjamin-strider:

perchu:

boys with collarbones (✿◠‿◠)

boys with clavicles (◕‿◕✿)

boys with spines (。♥‿♥。)

boys with patellas (≧◡≦)

boys with phalanges (◑‿◐)

boys with thoracic vertebrae (✿ ♥‿♥)

 

image

hello ladies

sernacht:

So, I was in the car today and saw someone with the license plate “X0DUS3 5”, so I thought it was like Exodus 3:5 and I looked it up, and do you know what it said?

"Do not come any closer"

tags: that is so clever + funnyreference +

tall-dark-n-creepy:

dajo42:

whenever somebody says like “so what did you do today?” just look off into the distance and say “the right thing”

Then stare right into their eyes and say, “I hope”

animationalley:

do you ever start eating something and think “man i don’t even want this”

but then you just keep eating it